As many of you know, when Carlee was born I fought fiercely to have the breastfeeding relationship that I had envisioned. I spent many months feeling guilty, not enjoying whatever was left of that relationship and just simply like a failure. I could not figure out how to fix this, nor did I know how to get help for this. Until I found the local La Leche League, and a world of supportive moms full of knowledge to help guide me through examining what may have gone wrong with our first attempt as well as helping me prepare to try again with baby 2- Emma:) They sat with me as I cried out my feelings and worked my way to a place of fight! I would have a plan, and if at the end of that I still did not have a full supply then I would redefine what a successful breastfeeding relationship was and learn to enjoy what we had, whatever it looked like.
So, with Carlee I had a lot of pain latching which I later learned indicated a latch issue but I also had PCOS which is related to a lack of breast tissue growth in pregnancy for a small percentage. It was impossible at this point to know whether one or both were responsible for my previous experience so I needed to prepare for both possibilities.
My plan:)
A variety of supplements and a network of women to help me address any latching issues that may arise, as well as the contact info for a well known breastfeeding guru - Jack Newman. I knew this time around, at the end of the day I would have done all I could to give my daughter that relationship.
Then, Emma was born November 20th at 6:12 am in our guest bedroom with our wonderful midwives. Big Sister Carlee got to be in the room as she woke up just before delivery having slept through everything up til then - and then went off to spend the day with a neighbour and give us some time to sleep and cuddle with Emma! It was a beautiful start of just being in bed together nursing and sleeping the day away:)
Days passed and my mom took care of Carlee so I could just focus on letting Emma nurse as much as she wanted - all day and all night:) We all held our breath as the day came that Carlee stopped gaining - I even called a friend and LLL leader to assure me that her latch looked good - and we waited for the midwife to come assess how we were doing.
We watched impatiently as she took the sling and scale and put Emma in....and saw the numbers go up and up.....and it was confirmed!
Emma was gaining! No, not just gaining - she was thriving:)
We were nursing like there was not even the possibility of a problem and no sign of any issues in sight.
And that was it - no pumping, no herbs, no getting tongue ties cut or going on drugs...this time around I got to simply enjoy holding my baby and know that for whatever reason, this time my baby was surviving just off of me!
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| My beautiful girls:) |
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